Oh dear, that is a worry.
Truth is though, the social element they miss out on in normal school includes its fair share of negative as well as positive aspects. Think peer pressure, teasing, being left out, having arguments, unkindness, not getting a turn, feeling stupid, not getting picked for the team etc. Now children have got to experience all of that to learn how to handle it. At some point (but hopefully not too often), children will need to know how to cope with feeling powerless, losing, rejection, teasing, being told off, other people's aggression and irrational behaviour.
We're okay with our boys experiencing those scenarios with family in normal life rather than within a school system where it can be a trial and error approach. Case in point - K would occasionally come home from school and report that he had no-one to play with at lunch. We discussed strategies - how about tomorrow you ask this child if they'd like to play, or suggest this game, ask this child for a play date, hang out in this place, or pay this child to play with you (the last one is a joke, don't write in).
Then the next day, in K goes and then out he comes a few hours later to report on the success or otherwise of whichever strategy he tried. Black box education on one of the most important skills children need.
The question isn't what they miss out on socially. It's whether you can identify and articulate the social education a child needs and then meet those needs. One by one.
So here's my quick brain dump of essential social skills for children that you get free from school but can pick up elsewhere if you're EHE:
- Finding and keeping friends
- Sharing and negotiating
- Manners
- Winning and losing
- Listening and following instructions
- Contributing and standing your ground
- Controlling feelings and accepting consequences
Great social opportunities for Home Ed families:
- Staying in, where you might see and interact with: people
- Going out, where you might see and interact with: people
I'm being facetious but the point I'm making is this: what makes the specific group of children at school so special that it's better than any other social group children can interact with? Maybe there are benefits to children interacting with a wider range of ages, cultures, situations. There are sports clubs, music and theatre groups, youth clubs, scouts, shops, parks - all full of interesting people.
This isn't rocket science. Wherever there are people you can teach your children social skills.
